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Thirty One: His Supplication in Repentance

Supplication in Repentance

 

Thirty One: His Supplication in Repentance

اللّهُمّ يَا مَنْ لَا يَصِفُهُ نَعْتُ الْوَاصِفِينَ‏ وَ يَا مَنْ لَا يُجَاوِزُهُ رَجَاءُ الرّاجِينَ‏ وَ يَا مَنْ لَا يَضِيعُ لَدَيْهِ أَجْرُ الْمُحْسِنِينَ‏ وَ يَا مَنْ هُوَ مُنْتَهَى خَوْفِ الْعَابِدِينَ. وَ يَا مَنْ هُوَ غَايَةُ خَشْيَةِ الْمُتّقِينَ‏ هَذَا مَقَامُ مَنْ تَدَاوَلَتْهُ أَيْدِي الذّنُوبِ، وَ قَادَتْهُ أَزِمّةُ الْخَطَايَا، وَ اسْتَحْوَذَ عَلَيْهِ الشّيْطَانُ، فَقَصّرَ عَمّا أَمَرْتَ بِهِ تَفْرِيطاً، وَ تَعَاطَى مَا نَهَيْتَ عَنْهُ تَغْرِيراً. كَالْجَاهِلِ بِقُدْرَتِكَ عَلَيْهِ، أَوْ كَالْمُنْكِرِ فَضْلَ إِحْسَانِكَ إِلَيْهِ حَتّى إِذَا انْفَتَحَ لَهُ بَصَرُ الْهُدَى، وَ تَقَشّعَتْ عَنْهُ سَحَائِبُ الْعَمَى، أَحْصَى مَا ظَلَمَ بِهِ نَفْسَهُ، وَ فَكّرَ فِيمَا خَالَفَ بِهِ رَبّهُ، فَرَأَى كَبِيرَ عِصْيَانِهِ كَبِيراً وَ جَلِيلَ مُخَالَفَتِهِ جَلِيلًا. فَأَقْبَلَ نَحْوَكَ مُؤَمّلًا لَكَ مُسْتَحْيِياً مِنْكَ، وَ وَجّهَ رَغْبَتَهُ إِلَيْكَ ثِقَةً بِكَ، فَأَمّكَ بِطَمَعِهِ يَقِيناً، وَ قَصَدَكَ بِخَوْفِهِ إِخْلَاصاً، قَدْ خَلَا طَمَعُهُ مِنْ كُلّ مَطْمُوعٍ فِيهِ غَيْرِكَ، وَ أَفْرَخَ رَوْعُهُ مِنْ كُلّ مَحْذُورٍ مِنْهُ سِوَاكَ. فَمَثَلَ بَيْنَ يَدَيْكَ مُتَضَرّعاً، وَ غَمّضَ بَصَرَهُ إِلَى الْأَرْضِ مُتَخَشّعاً، وَ طَأْطَأَ رَأْسَهُ لِعِزّتِكَ مُتَذَلّلًا، وَ أَبَثّكَ مِنْ سِرّهِ مَا أَنْتَ أَعْلَمُ بِهِ مِنْهُ خُضُوعاً، وَ عَدّدَ مِنْ ذُنُوبِهِ مَا أَنْتَ أَحْصَى لَهَا خُشُوعاً، وَ اسْتَغَاثَ بِكَ مِنْ عَظِيمِ مَا وَقَعَ بِهِ فِي عِلْمِكَ وَ قَبِيحِ مَا فَضَحَهُ فِي حُكْمِكَ مِنْ ذُنُوبٍ أَدْبَرَتْ لَذّاتُهَا فَذَهَبَتْ، وَ أَقَامَتْ تَبِعَاتُهَا فَلَزِمَتْ. لَا يُنْكِرُ يَا إِلَهِي عَدْلَكَ إِنْ عَاقَبْتَهُ، وَ لَا يَسْتَعْظِمُ عَفْوَكَ إِنْ عَفَوْتَ عَنْهُ وَ رَحِمْتَهُ، لِأَنّكَ الرّبّ الْكَرِيمُ الّذِي لَا يَتَعَاظَمُهُ غُفْرَانُ الذّنْبِ الْعَظِيمِ‏ اللّهُمّ فَهَا أَنَا ذَا قَدْ جِئْتُكَ مُطِيعاً لِأَمْرِكَ فِيمَا أَمَرْتَ بِهِ مِنَ الدّعَاءِ، مُتَنَجّزاً وَعْدَكَ فِيمَا وَعَدْتَ بِهِ مِنَ الْإِجَابَةِ، إِذْ تَقُولُ ادْعُونِي أَسْتَجِبْ لَكُمْ. اللّهُمّ فَصَلّ عَلَى مُحَمّدٍ وَ آلِهِ، وَ الْقَنِي بِمَغْفِرَتِكَ كَمَا لَقِيتُكَ بِإِقْرَارِي، وَ ارْفَعْنِي عَنْ مَصَارِعِ الذّنُوبِ كَمَا وَضَعْتُ لَكَ نَفْسِي، وَ اسْتُرْنِي بِسِتْرِكَ كَمَا تَأَنّيْتَنِي عَنِ الِانْتِقَامِ مِنّي. اللّهُمّ وَ ثَبّتْ فِي طَاعَتِكَ نِيّتِي، وَ أَحْكِمْ فِي عِبَادَتِكَ بَصِيرَتِي، وَ وَفّقْنِي مِنَ الْأَعْمَالِ لِمَا تَغْسِلُ بِهِ دَنَسَ الْخَطَايَا عَنّي، وَ تَوَفّنِي عَلَى مِلّتِكَ وَ مِلّةِ نَبِيّكَ مُحَمّدٍ عليه‌السلام إِذَا تَوَفّيْتَنِي. اللّهُمّ إِنّي أَتُوبُ إِلَيْكَ فِي مَقَامِي هَذَا مِنْ كَبَائِرِ ذُنُوبِي وَ صَغَائِرِهَا، وَ بَوَاطِنِ سَيّئَاتِي وَ ظَوَاهِرِهَا، وَ سَوَالِفِ زَلّاتِي وَ حَوَادِثِهَا، تَوْبَةَ مَنْ لَا يُحَدّثُ نَفْسَهُ بِمَعْصِيَةٍ، وَ لَا يُضْمِرُ أَنْ يَعُودَ فِي خَطِيئَةٍ وَ قَدْ قُلْتَ يَا إِلَهِي فِي مُحْكَمِ كِتَابِكَ إِنّكَ تَقْبَلُ التّوْبَةَ عَنْ عِبَادِكَ، وَ تَعْفُو عَنِ السّيّئَاتِ، وَ تُحِبّ التّوّابِينَ، فَاقْبَلْ تَوْبَتِي كَمَا وَعَدْتَ، وَ اعْفُ عَنْ سَيّئَاتِي كَمَا ضَمِنْتَ، وَ أَوْجِبْ لِي مَحَبّتَكَ كَمَا شَرَطْت‏ وَ لَكَ يَا رَبّ شَرْطِي أَلّا أَعُودَ فِي مَكْرُوهِكَ، وَ ضَمَانِي أَنْ لَا أَرْجِعَ فِي مَذْمُومِكَ، وَ عَهْدِي أَنْ أَهْجُرَ جَمِيعَ مَعَاصِيكَ. اللّهُمّ إِنّكَ أَعْلَمُ بِمَا عَمِلْتُ فَاغْفِرْ لِي مَا عَلِمْتَ، وَ اصْرِفْنِي بِقُدْرَتِكَ إِلَى مَا أَحْبَبْتَ. اللّهُمّ وَ عَلَيّ تَبِعَاتٌ قَدْ حَفِظْتُهُنّ، وَ تَبِعَاتٌ قَدْ نَسِيتُهُنّ، وَ كُلّهُنّ بِعَيْنِكَ الّتِي لَا تَنَامُ، وَ عِلْمِكَ الّذِي لَا يَنْسَى، فَعَوّضْ مِنْهَا أَهْلَهَا، وَ احْطُطْ عَنّي وِزْرَهَا، وَ خَفّفْ عَنّي ثِقْلَهَا، وَ اعْصِمْنِي مِنْ أَنْ أُقَارِفَ مِثْلَهَا. اللّهُمّ وَ إِنّهُ لَا وَفَاءَ لِي بِالتّوْبَةِ إِلّا بِعِصْمَتِكَ، وَ لَا اسْتِمْسَاكَ بِي عَنِ الْخَطَايَا إِلّا عَنْ قُوّتِكَ، فَقَوّنِي بِقُوّةٍ كَافِيَةٍ، وَ تَوَلّنِي بِعِصْمَةٍ مَانِعَةٍ. اللّهُمّ أَيّمَا عَبْدٍ تَابَ إِلَيْكَ وَ هُوَ فِي عِلْمِ الْغَيْبِ عِنْدَكَ فَاسِخٌ لِتَوْبَتِهِ، وَ عَائِدٌ فِي ذَنْبِهِ وَ خَطِيئَتِهِ، فَإِنّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ أَنْ أَكُونَ كَذَلِكَ، فَاجْعَلْ تَوْبَتِي هَذِهِ تَوْبَةً لَا أَحْتَاجُ بَعْدَهَا إِلَى تَوْبَةٍ، تَوْبَةً مُوجِبَةً لِمَحْوِ مَا سَلَفَ، وَ السّلَامَةِ فِيمَا بَقِيَ. اللّهُمّ إِنّي أَعْتَذِرُ إِلَيْكَ مِنْ جَهْلِي، وَ أَسْتَوْهِبُكَ سُوءَ فِعْلِي، فَاضْمُمْنِي إِلَى كَنَفِ رَحْمَتِكَ تَطَوّلًا، وَ اسْتُرْنِي بِسِتْرِ عَافِيَتِكَ تَفَضّلًا. اللّهُمّ وَ إِنّي أَتُوبُ إِلَيْكَ مِنْ كُلّ مَا خَالَفَ إِرَادَتَكَ، أَوْ زَالَ عَنْ مَحَبّتِكَ مِنْ خَطَرَاتِ قَلْبِي، وَ لَحَظَاتِ عَيْنِي، وَ حِكَايَاتِ لِسَانِي، تَوْبَةً تَسْلَمُ بِهَا كُلّ جَارِحَةٍ عَلَى حِيَالِهَا مِنْ تَبِعَاتِكَ، وَ تَأْمَنُ مِمَا يَخَافُ الْمُعْتَدُونَ مِنْ أَلِيمِ سَطَوَاتِكَ. اللّهُمّ فَارْحَمْ وَحْدَتِي بَيْنَ يَدَيْكَ، وَ وَجِيبَ قَلْبِي مِنْ خَشْيَتِكَ، وَ اضْطِرَابَ أَرْكَانِي مِنْ هَيْبَتِكَ، فَقَدْ أَقَامَتْنِي يَا رَبّ ذُنُوبِي مَقَامَ الْخِزْيِ بِفِنَائِكَ، فَإِنْ سَكَتّ لَمْ يَنْطِقْ عَنّي أَحَدٌ، وَ إِنْ شَفَعْتُ فَلَسْتُ بِأَهْلِ الشّفَاعَةِ. اللّهُمّ صَلّ عَلَى مُحَمّدٍ وَ آلِهِ، وَ شَفّعْ فِي خَطَايَايَ كَرَمَكَ، وَ عُدْ عَلَى سَيّئَاتِي بِعَفْوِكَ، وَ لَا تَجْزِنِي جَزَائِي مِنْ عُقُوبَتِكَ، وَ ابْسُطْ عَلَيّ طَوْلَكَ، وَ جَلّلْنِي بِسِتْرِكَ، وَ افْعَلْ بِي فِعْلَ عَزِيزٍ تَضَرّعَ إِلَيْهِ عَبْدٌ ذَلِيلٌ فَرَحِمَهُ، أَوْ غَنِيّ‏ٍ تَعَرّضَ لَهُ عَبْدٌ فَقِيرٌ فَنَعَشَهُ. اللّهُمّ لَا خَفِيرَ لِي مِنْكَ فَلْيَخْفُرْنِي عِزّكَ، وَ لَا شَفِيعَ لِي إِلَيْكَ فَلْيَشْفَعْ لِي فَضْلُكَ، وَ قَدْ أَوْجَلَتْنِي خَطَايَايَ فَلْيُؤْمِنّي عَفْوُكَ. فَمَا كُلّ مَا نَطَقْتُ بِهِ عَنْ جَهْلٍ مِنّي بِسُوءِ أَثَرِي، وَ لَا نِسْيَانٍ لِمَا سَبَقَ مِنْ ذَمِيمِ فِعْلِي، لَكِنْ لِتَسْمَعَ سَمَاؤُكَ وَ مَنْ فِيهَا وَ أَرْضُكَ وَ مَنْ عَلَيْهَا مَا أَظْهَرْتُ لَكَ مِنَ النّدَمِ، وَ لَجَأْتُ إِلَيْكَ فِيهِ مِنَ التّوْبَةِ. فَلَعَلّ بَعْضَهُمْ بِرَحْمَتِكَ يَرْحَمُنِي لِسُوءِ مَوْقِفِي، أَوْ تُدْرِكُهُ الرّقّةُ عَلَيّ لِسُوءِ حَالِي فَيَنَالَنِي مِنْهُ بِدَعْوَةٍ هِيَ أَسْمَعُ لَدَيْكَ مِنْ دُعَائِي، أَوْ شَفَاعَةٍ أَوْكَدُ عِنْدَكَ مِنْ شَفَاعَتِي تَكُونُ بِهَا نَجَاتِي مِنْ غَضَبِكَ وَ فَوْزَتِي بِرِضَاكَ. اللّهُمّ إِنْ يَكُنِ النّدَمُ تَوْبَةً إِلَيْكَ فَأَنَا أَنْدَمُ النّادِمِينَ، وَ إِنْ يَكُنِ التّرْكُ لِمَعْصِيَتِكَ إِنَابَةً فَأَنَا أَوّلُ الْمُنِيبِينَ، وَ إِنْ يَكُنِ الِاسْتِغْفَارُ حِطّةً لِلذّنُوبِ فَإِنّي لَكَ مِنَ الْمُسْتَغْفِرِينَ. اللّهُمّ فَكَمَا أَمَرْتَ بِالتّوْبَةِ، وَ ضَمِنْتَ الْقَبُولَ، وَ حَثَثْتَ عَلَى الدّعَاءِ، وَ وَعَدْتَ الْإِجَابَةَ، فَصَلّ عَلَى مُحَمّدٍ وَ آلِهِ، وَ اقْبَلْ تَوْبَتِي، وَ لَا تَرْجِعْنِي مَرْجِعَ الْخَيْبَةِ مِنْ رَحْمَتِكَ، إِنّكَ أَنْتَ التّوّابُ عَلَى الْمُذْنِبِينَ، وَ الرّحِيمُ لِلْخَاطِئِينَ الْمُنِيبِينَ. اللّهُمّ صَلّ عَلَى مُحَمّدٍ وَ آلِهِ، كَمَا هَدَيْتَنَا بِهِ، وَ صَلّ عَلَى مُحَمّدٍ وَ آلِهِ، كَمَا اسْتَنْقَذْتَنَا بِهِ، وَ صَلّ عَلَى مُحَمّدٍ وَ آلِهِ، صَلَاةً تَشْفَعُ لَنَا يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ وَ يَوْمَ الْفَاقَةِ إِلَيْكَ، إِنّكَ عَلَى كُلّ شَيْ‏ءٍ قَدِيرٌ، وَ هُوَ عَلَيْكَ يَسِيرٌ.

O God,
O He whom the depiction of the describers fails to describe! O He beyond whom passes not the hope of the hopers! O He with whom is not lost the wage of the good-doers! O He who is the ultimate object of the fear of the worshipers! O He who is the utmost limit of the dread of the god-fearing! This is the station of him whom sins have passed from hand to hand. Offenses' reins have led him on, and Satan has gained mastery over him. He fell short of what Thou hast commanded through neglect and he pursued what Thou hast prohibited in delusion, like one ignorant of Thy power over him or one who denies the bounty of Thy beneficence toward him, until, when the eye of guidance was opened for him and the clouds of blindness were dispelled, he reckoned that through which he had wronged himself and reflected upon that in which he had opposed his Lord. He saw his vast disobedience as vast and his great opposition as great. So turned to Thee, hoping in Thee and ashamed before Thee, and he directed his beseeching toward Thee, having trust in Thee. He repaired to Thee in his longing with certitude and he went straight to Thee in fear with sincerity. His longing was devoid of every object of longing but Thee, and his fright departed from every object of fear but Thee. So he stood before Thee pleading, his eyes turned toward the ground in humbleness, his head bowed before Thy might in lowliness; he revealed to Thee in meekness those secrets of his which Thou knowest better than he; he numbered for Thee in humility those sins of his which Thou countest better than he; he sought help from Thee before the dreadful into which he has fallen in Thy knowledge and the ugly which has disgraced him in Thy judgement: the sins whose pleasures have turned their backs and gone and whose evil consequences have stayed and stuck fast. He will not deny Thy justice, my God, if Thou punishest him, nor will he consider Thy pardon great if Thou pardonest him and hast mercy upon him, for Thou art the Generous Lord for whom the forgiveness of great sins is nothing great!

O God,
so here I am: I have come to Thee obeying Thy command (for Thou hast commanded supplication) and asking the fulfillment of Thy promise, (for Thou hast promised to respond) Thou hast said, Supplicate Me and I will respond to you.

O God,
so bless Muhammad and his Household, meet me with Thy forgiveness just as I have met Thee with my confession, lift me up from the fatal infirmities of sins just as I have let myself down before Thee, and cover me with Thy covering just as Thou hast shown no haste to take vengeance on me!

O God,
make firm my intention to obey Thee, strengthen my insight in worshipping Thee, give me the success of works which will wash away the defilement of offenses, and take me when Thou takest me in the creed of Thy prophet Muhammad (upon him be peace).

O God,
I repent to Thee in this my station from my sins, great and small, my evil deeds, inward and outward, my lapses, past and recent, with the repentance of one who does not tell himself that he might disobey or secretly think that he might return to an offense. Thou hast said, my God, in the firm text of Thy Book, that Thou acceptest repentance from Thy servants, pardonest evil deeds, and lovest the repenters, so accept my repentance as Thou hast promised, pardon my evil deeds as thou hast guaranteed, and make obligatory toward me Thy love as Thou hast stipulated! To Thee, my Lord, belongs my stipulation that I will not return to what is disliked by Thee, my guarantee that I will not go back to what Thou blamest, and my covenant that I will stay away from acts of disobedience to Thee.

O God,
Thou knowest better what I have done, so forgive me what Thou knowest and turn me through Thy power to what Thou lovest!

O God,
counted against me are claims that stay in my memory and claims that I have forgotten, while all of them remain in Thy eye that does not sleep and Thy knowledge that does not forget! So compensate their owners, lighten their load upon me, lift up their weight from me, and preserve me from approaching their like!

O God,
but I can not be faithful to my repentance without Thy preservation, nor can I refrain from offenses without Thy strength. So strengthen me with a sufficient strength and attend to me with a defending preservation!

O God,
if any servant repents to Thee, while in Thy knowledge of the Unseen he will break his repentance and return to his sin and offense, I seek refuge in Thee lest I be like that! So make this my repentance a repentance after which I will need no repentance and a repentance which will obligate the erasing of what has gone by and safety in what remains!

O God,
I ask pardon from Thee for my ignorance, and I ask Thee to disregard my evil acts! So join me to the shelter of Thy mercy through graciousness and cover me with the covering of Thy well-being through bounteousness!

O God,
I repent to Thee from everything opposed to Thy will or far from Thy love - the thoughts of my heart, the glances of my eye, the tales of my tongue - with a repentance through which each bodily part will by itself stay safe from ill consequences with Thee and remain secure from Thy painful penalties feared by transgressors!

O God,
so have mercy on my being alone before Thee, the pounding of my heart in dread of Thee, the trembling of my limbs in awe of Thee! My sins, my God, have stood me in the station of degradation in Thy courtyard. If I remain silent, none will speak for me; if I seek an intercessor, I am not worthy for intercession.

O God,
bless Muhammad and his Household, make Thy generosity intercede for my offenses, follow up my evil deeds with Thy pardon, repay me not with the punishment that is my proper repayment, spread over me Thy graciousness, wrap me in Thy covering, and do with me what is done by a mighty man, when a lowly slave pleads to him and he shows him mercy, or a rich man, when a poor slave submits himself and he raises him to wealth!

O God,
I have no protector against Thee, so let Thy might be my protector! I have no intercessor with Thee, so let Thy bounty be my intercessor! My offenses have set me quaking, so let Thy pardon give me security! Not all that I have said rises up from my ignorance of my evil footsteps or forgetfulness of my blameworthy acts in the past, but in order that Thy heaven and those within it and Thy earth and those upon it may hear the remorse which I have professed to Thee and the repentance through which I have sought asylum with Thee. Then perhaps one of them, through Thy mercy, may show mercy upon my evil situation or be seized by tenderness for my evil state. There may come from him for my sake a supplication to which Thou givest ear more than to my supplication or an intercession surer with Thee than my intercession through which I may be delivered from Thy wrath and attain to Thy good pleasure!

O God,
if remorse is a repentance toward Thee, then I am the most remorseful of the remorseful! If refraining from disobedience is a turning back to Thee, then I am the first of those who turn back! If praying for forgiveness alleviates sins, surely I am one of those who pray for Thy forgiveness!

O God,
as Thou hast commanded repentance and guaranteed acceptance, as Thou hast urged supplication, and promised to respond, so also bless Muhammad and his Household, accept my repentance, and return me not to the returning place of disappointment in Thy mercy! Surely Thou art Ever-turning toward the sinners, All-compassionate toward the offenders who turn back!

O God,
bless Muhammad and his Household just as Thou hast guided us by him! Bless Muhammad and his Household just as Thou hast rescued us through him! Bless Muhammad and his Household, with a blessing that will intercede for us on the Day of Resurrection, the day of neediness toward Thee! Thou art powerful over everything, and that is easy for Thee!

Al-Sahifa Al-Sajjadiyyah, p. 140

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